There is plenty to explore for young men. Their make-up, grooming and awareness give room for plenty of adventure. And for every exploration and adventure there is a prize. It is believed that the prospect of having a woman as a reward of any adventure is fascinating for men. Thus, it’ s no surprise that girls are groomed to be wary of the men around them. They are brought up to believe that the men who come around them have ulterior motives.
The cases of many men in wolves’ skins have done little for men’ s reputation. The provable stories of girls who were naive with men being taken advantage of, have also not enhanced men’s profiles. Violations, rape, incest, unwanted pregnancies ... all have the imprints of men; very damning imprints. But will it be right to brand all men as birds of a feather, leopards who will not change their spots and cunning foxes whenever a woman is involved?
It is a hard call; nonetheless, it is also a worthy one - men are not only thinking about sex around women. It is depressing to hear the cliche ‘all men are the same’. That’s a big lie that has been sold to female folk over the years. Without any advocacy tone, men do have a life outside women and sex and being freaky. Men do have a sense of destiny. And this can make men go the whole hog without any sexual demands. Men do act without any strings attached. They do mean well for women when they mean well.
Playing the numbers game for sexual offences will not do any favours to men, agreed. But there are also plenty of men who genuinely desire to see a woman get the best out of life. Men exist who want to be a part of the answers to a woman’s prayer. Definitely they do not want to add to a woman’s tears and anguish at any point. Moments of disappointment in the relationship will occur, but the disappointments will not be along the lines of ‘even you. I never expected this.’
There are few good men, we have also heard. But these few good men are directly proportional to the few good women around. That a woman expects every man to ask for sexual gratification for help received from men does her psyche no good. This takes the shine off a rewarding friendship and adds to the man’s frustrations. Men can be men: responsible and visionary. This is what drives them and makes them want to lay their all.
It is patheti,c thinking that all-men-are-no-good. It is very disappointing seeing that women offer themselves as a’ thank-you gift for all you have done’ to men. Men do derive pleasure from helping out. They do find fulfilment in shaping a woman’s destiny. They would gladly put their resources and manpower to work to see that good is perpetuated in the land.
Men are not animals, they are created beings, to effect and affect change. They do care for women a lot. This should not be misconstrued to mean they are after sex every time. For them, there are many pleasurable things other than sexual pleasure: a good name, a life well spent and making heaven. This is true.