Some people who are new in a relationship often wonder when it is right to pop out the word “I love you”, because it is an overwhelming word that wells up happy emotions to some people; while to others, it could sound awkward and result in silence.
So many people place a lot of importance on the word, especially when it comes to saying it to a new person.
In case you’re in a new relationship or have started dating someone recently and you are wondering when it would be ideal for you to say “I love you” to your partner, here are some tips some experts have put together for you to keep in mind before you say I love you for the first time.
Let your date know
Your date should know your intentions much before you actually reveal them. Let your date know just how serious you are about the relationship.
When you get some time to speak with each other, talk about how special you feel when he or she is around and how romantic and meaningful your life has become since the partner stepped into it. If you’re dating someone who’s only looking for a fling, they’ll know it’s time to back off.
Let your romantic gestures reveal your intentions. Casual daters don’t go out of their way to do something nice for each other. If you truly love someone and you are only waiting for the opportune moment, start to treat your date like you would treat your lover.
Your date will instinctively know where the relationship is heading.
Test your compatibility
Can you visualize your date five years from now? Do you really love this person you’re dating? Or is it just an infatuation that’s clouding your mind? Love isn’t a trivial thing.
Before you say ‘I love you’, you need to be sure that you would want this person in your life as something more than just a weekend date.
Who says it?
It’s usually a man’s job to profess his love and control the direction of the relationship. So all you men out there, man up and make a move. See how easy it is to make a guy feel important? Just say the wheel of the relationship is in his hands and he’ll feel flattered.
But as much as the man holds the wheel, the woman is the navigator who plans the directions. It doesn’t matter who says it first.
But generally, women play with their cards closer to the chest as evolution has trained them to play hard to get. After all, women have one egg a month to share with a man. Men have billions of sperms in every casual shoot. Who do you think needs to protect their resources more?
Go out on at least five dates You think five dates are too soon? Well, it is early, but completely acceptable. The ideal time to say ‘I love you’ would be a couple of months.
Wait for two months if you can hold your emotions in and try to figure the direction of the relationship. If you still love every moment you spend with your date, perhaps it’s time to take the plunge.
Don’t wait too long
Listen to your gut. Wait too long and you may even lose the relationship. Sometimes, your date may get tired of waiting, especially if the girl’s waiting for the guy to say the three magical words! It’s always better to express your love earlier than later.
Don’t expect a response immediately
After you’ve said the words to your partner, don’t push your luck. At times, your date may just not be ready to say anything back, or perhaps, they just need more time to say it back to you.
You’ve poured your heart out. Enjoy the moment when you’ve revealed your thoughts and sit back. The response will come when it has to.
Most people go wrong here. If you confess your love for someone, and the person does not respond back with anything, don’t apologize. Apologizing after asking someone out just to cover up the awkwardness will only make things feel worse.
You’re saying what’s on your mind. Why should you apologize for that? If your date isn’t ready to hear that, they probably have their own issues to deal with anyway.
Don’t respond on their behalf
Awkward silences are fine here. You’ve made a big revelation. You’ve just told your date that you love him or her. And that means you wish to become an exclusive couple, which means you may get married some day and have babies together.
You see, there are a lot of things your date has to think of the minute you say ‘I love you’. Give enough time for your date to think, and don’t go mouthing something just to cut the silence.
Don’t say things like “I know it’s too early…”, “I should never have said that… what was I thinking?” or “Don’t worry about it, I just said what was on my mind, you don’t have to say anything back to me”. If you answer on your date’s behalf, your date may just smile at you awkwardly and talk about something else.
You’ve just helped your date squirm out without giving you an answer. Unless you intend to keep proposing your love every weekend, avoid answering on your date’s behalf.
Culled from www.lovepanky.com