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LIFE AND CULTURE

How To Know You Are In A Toxic Relationship

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When you are in love, a lot of things tend to go unnoticed. Your head is in the clouds and your mind is stuck in a bubble. While enjoying the good, you suddenly find yourself paying a blind eye to the bad. Then, it is not long before you are making excuses for your partner’s toxic behaviors. Of course, relationships are all about accommodating each other’s idiosyncrasies and accepting flaws. Nonetheless, every individual has boundaries that should never be crossed by their significant other. Most of us are brought up on the foundations that relationships are not always a bed of roses so, we must put in extra effort in times of difficulty.

In truth, not every relationship is worth fighting for. Sometimes the end of a relationship will be the beginning of your best life. Are you in a toxic or unhealthy relationship? Have you been feeling doubts as to whether what you have is meant for the long haul? Here are a few signs that your relationship is need of some remodeling or a complete demolition.

No in-betweens – You notice that in your relationship there is never a middle ground. You both are either dangerously in love or at each other’s necks. One minute you believe your partner makes you the happiest person in the world and the next minute you feel strongly towards them -negatively. Any relationship that is balancing on only extremes is doomed to hit the rocks. A healthy relationship ought to have moments that are “uneventful.” You both should be able to enjoy each other’s company without either whirlwind romance or war.

Walking on shells – It is a sign that you care if you take into account how your actions affect your significant other. However, it becomes problematic when anxiety or even fear becomes attached to it. If you notice you are always worried about upsetting your partner or feel uptight whenever they are around, this is bad! You should not filter and edit your every word, move, or action for anyone. Anyone who makes you feel like that is not good for you.

Passive aggression – Granted, not everyone is confrontational. Some people need to lock themselves away to figure out how they can voice their distress. However, a partner who intentionally keeps discontent within themselves and uses it against you at every opportunity is bad for you. An issue should not have to stick around long after it actually occurred. Things must be addressed (with love and respect) as they occur. Holding unto things and punishing your partner on the low will only tear at the bond you both have.

You’re exhausted – Love is not aerobics. If you feel emotionally, physically, and/or financially spent all the time, run! Your relationship ought to be your haven. After you have been busy throughout the day, you should be daydreaming of the rest that will come from going home to your partner or even just talking to them over the phone. You should not feel like they are the main source of stress. Your relationship is not supposed to feel like it is constantly ripping at the seams or in need of unending attention. Do not get it wrong, it takes work to sustain even the healthiest relationships. However, a good relationship already has certain tools that allow it to function adequately on its own.

 

 

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