Pastor Emmanuel Iren has advised married women to be mindful of how often they correct their husbands, warning that constant criticism or instruction could gradually affect romance and communication in marriage.
Speaking during a session on relationships and marriage, Iren urged women to resist the temptation to constantly tell their partners what to do, saying excessive correction could change the way a man perceives his wife.
According to the pastor, repeatedly correcting a husband could make him begin to see his wife more as a mother than a romantic partner.
“And women, listen to me. Stop trying to tell the man what to do all the time. You will kill the romance in that house. A man you correct all the time will start seeing you as his mother,” he said.
He added that such women might eventually begin to wonder why the affection or spark in their relationships had diminished, without realising that their constant attempts to correct their partners could be contributing to the situation.
“And now you’re wondering where the spark has gone to. You’re correcting him all the time. It won’t work. It will not work,” Iren said.
Rather than giving instructions, the pastor encouraged women to learn to communicate their concerns as suggestions and allow their husbands room to make mistakes.
“And sometimes you must learn to allow him to be wrong. You see, suggest, don’t instruct,” he advised.
Iren further argued that changing the manner in which concerns are communicated could make men more receptive to their wives and create a safer environment for communication.
“If you do what I’m saying, the man will learn to listen to you more. And he will feel safe listening to you,” he added.
His comments have reignited a familiar conversation around communication, respect and intimacy in marriage, particularly on the difference between offering guidance and constantly attempting to control a partner’s decisions.
While his advice was directed at women, healthy communication in marriage generally requires both partners to be able to express concerns without belittling, controlling or dismissing each other.
For Iren, the central message was simple: correction should not become the dominant language of a relationship.
Sometimes, he suggested, preserving intimacy may require choosing the right moment, changing the tone and allowing one’s partner the freedom to make mistakes.
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