Old age is a thing of grace and is celebrated globally as everyone will attain the status. How it is handled is what determines the state of happiness or unhappiness of the person and his/her family. A 65-year-old retiree, Mrs. Rebecca Peters shared her bitter experience with our correspondent which underscored the feeling of different folks to old people’s home, whether they would allow their parent to spend the rest of their lives there or not. According to Mrs. Peters, her father was maltreated by a relative who was assigned to be his care-giver. She stated the relative who was to look after her aged father in the village was paid to do this, but he never showed compassion towards her father when he was alive.
“My late father was maltreated, not properly fed as less attention was given to his well-being. It was too late before I discovered the harm they had caused but what can I do? I believe God will judge everyone according to what we have done on earth. They ate his food, locked him inside and did not pay attention to his hygiene. This relative who is well paid for this purpose will call to demand trivial things saying my dad demands this thing which we later found out was a blatant lie,” says Rebecca Peters.
Indeed the financial status of the children of the aged, largely determines the manner of care given to their parent or their aged. The Old People’s Home may have arisen to fill the gap when the children of the aged are not in the country where he/she is. In Mrs Peters’ case as it is in this clime, a relation is normally the care giver and most times are rewarded for their efforts. But in this case, the care giver abused the priviledge. These kind of ill treatments towards the aged are one of the reasons among others the old people’s homes were established.
Mrs Peters speaking on what her late dad experienced, added that she does not want to be a burden to any to her own siblings, knowing they are all struggling to find their feet while catering for their families, with the persistent increase in soaring expenses eating deep into her finances. “I would willingly take myself into one of these homes knowing that I do not want to be a liability to anyone in the future which is the reason I am in full support of parents ending up in elderly homes if they could not live with their children and there is a guarantee of proper care and support that would be given to them.”
Mr. Edwards Nwaneri, a sociologist opined that there is a paradigm shift among some sets of parents, as they are now planning for their old age with or without the children’s consent. He enthused that parents are planning for their old age resettlement to be among their kin due to the generation of children nowadays being unpredictable. “Above all it, senior citizens moving to elderly homes can help reduce the loneliness that many elders experience, as well as other exercises they engage in. While in an environment where your loved one can feel valued and wanted.
Adesewa Philips, a corporate lady who secured her mum in Old people’s home giving reasons on the choice said, “Knowing that I am out of the country, I and my other sibling decided to make arrangements with one of the Old people’s homes where her frail mother will be because she needs extra care due to dementia and other factors. We are from a small family of two children as we lost our father at an early age knowing we do and I would not want my mother’s situation to weigh down any relative. This is the reason we both decided to take that decision and I would be visiting it,” she said.
A visit to Marian Akinsola Senior Citizen Care Home, a private home located at Abule-Egba, Lagos by our correspondent revealed the safety and modalities involved. One of the officials, madam Kemi explaining how one can secure the aged in the home said, “Firstly, you obtain a form for N10,000 as we conduct a background check and also a medical test carried out to ascertain the health condition of the elderly person. This cost N20,000. If we are to do it or can be done by the family, as we will check it before they bring their parent or the senior citizen here”.
However, she said, presently the monthly payment that would cover the feeding and laundry with all the stuff provided by the house would cost 180,000 as this is the amount to be paid for one senior citizen every month. She further stated that if the elderly person makes use of diapers, the family would be responsible for it just as for those who are on medication the families would be responsible for their provision and also for those who are on medication as well.
The caregiver stated that the home has an in-house nurse catering to the well-being /medical challenges If there is any. While stating further that the elderly persons are treated like family, due to the care they are given, as they are often in need of people to communicate with or engage them in whatever they have an interest in. “It is important to keep the elderly persons in a good state of mind, as they become lively and the families are allowed to visit at all times all through the week as this helps their state of well-being”
Speaking further on the patronage, Kemi noted that there are people who are abroad with their parents in the home being taken care of. “For some other persons abroad with parents here, they keep in touch with them through video calls, or send their relatives to come to the home and check up on their elderly ones. Though there are cases of people who traveled abroad and have their parents in the home, once they come back into the country, they come and check their parents here as they believe this is truly home for them. I can tell you that in the six years of operation of Marian Akinsola Senior Citizen Care Home, it still has some of the elderly people that started with them due to the quality care service given to these elderly persons.”
She noted that though having the aged in a home separate from their own residences or that of the children seems alien to our culture, embracing this approach does not mean the love for their parents does not exist, but present numerous factors could be the determinant why such move are considered.
