Bad Parenting And Dangerous Trends Of Cruelty To Infants

It is not uncommon to watch a video perhaps on social media where you see toddlers being maltreated by housemaids, house helps, nannies, or even caregivers. In such videos, toddlers are seen visibly suffering from severe and frequent physical abuse, including being hit with an object, slammed on the floor, or deprived of food by caregivers.

However, the worrisome twist was when a yet-to-be-identified man suspected to be the baby’s father was seen sharing a substance, suspected to be marijuana, with an infant in a viral video.

In the video posted on Twitter by a user, Ikeokwu Chidozie, the man was smoking what looks like a wrap of marijuana and then forcing it into the mouth of the baby girl he was carrying.

Outraged by the video, Nigerians took to Twitter to tag the Nigeria Police Force, National Drug Law Enforcement Agency (NDLEA), and other security agencies, calling for the arrest of the man in the video.

The Twitter user, Chidozie, wrote, “When and how did we get here as a society? Egbon, @Princemoye1 please we need this guy prosecuted and the accomplice too.

“Haba! Remember when Iya Kudu (a neighbour) will spank us for misdemeanor as kids but now the society is empty. Cc: @ndlea_nigeria.”

A child rights activist, James Uneze, while speaking exclusively with LEADERSHIP Weekend stressed that bad parenting can have a lasting adverse impact on your child in terms of behaviour and psychology.

Uneze called for the immediate arrest of the man in the trending video.

He urged parents to pay key attention to their infant, saying it’s not always easy to know whether a child’s caregiver is doing their job or not.

Uneze urged parents not to entrust their babies to wrong hands.

“Prior to now, if you are going out your neighbor can help to look after your child but you can’t try that anymore. Communal living is failing. We don’t have better communal living anymore so people just need to be extra careful,” he said.

He also urged young Nigerians not to be in a haste to have babies, saying not every adult is mature enough to be a parent.

He said, “Not every adult should have a baby. Not everybody can babysit, to be sure, caring parents may have to do some sleuthing. Some parents who suspect something’s amiss rent nanny surveillance equipment. But it’s often possible to tell whether something’s wrong without going to that extreme.”

He also decried that values are also weaning hence, “we need to be careful we need to know who we engage as caregivers.”

A psychologist, Mahak Ahora, noted that not everyone is mature enough to be a parent, saying bad parenting can seriously harm the child’s demeanour and psychology.

Ahora said bad parenting isn’t restricted to a single act; it is a collection of acts that are usually what contributes to a harmful effect on the child.

He noted that most poor parenting may not be intentional, but this does not reduce its negative impact on the child.

According to him, “Some parents are not aware of the consequences of these actions and some might not even care.

“Bad parenting might stem from not knowing enough to be a better parent or from a general lack of apathy to learning the right way.

“Bad parenting can have many adverse effects on your child. With our lifestyles being as fast-paced as they are today, it might seem easy to just tell your child what to do.”

He, however, stressed that a child is an individual who requires care and nurturing from parents.

He further advised parents too, “Make the time to join parenting groups and forums and bring up any issues you might be facing. Have an honest conversation with other parents and listen to any advice they might have. If there are any signs of the effects of poor parenting in your child, it might be best to consult a child psychologist.”

Mothers Now Chase Money Give Less Time for their Kids – CRACO

The executive director, Child Rights Awareness Creation Organisation (CRACO), Barr. Joseph Igwe decried that some mothers now chase money and wealth and do no longer have time for their children.

He said both parents now go to work and come back late in the night and that is the reason why children are given to housemaids or retarded individuals who become an option to fill in the gap.

Igwe said nobody can take care of a child more than the mother, no matter who the person is, adding that a woman or a nursing mother who left her children for a housemaid or even her husband should not expect to get the best.

He said: ‘’I would advise parents and mothers or women to try as much as possible to create time for their children.

“They should be selective in the kind of work or job they do or they accept they should ensure that any job that they accept can give them enough time to come home and take care of the children and then if it is possible I would even advise them to be self-employed so that they can have sufficient time but, if that is not possible maybe they should employ a house help, first I would advise they go for someone that they know someone that is a relative to them maybe a family member someone that a relative.”

Reacting to the development, the  Police Force Spokesperson, Olumuyiwa Adejobi, said the force would arrest the said man and urged Nigerians with information about him to speak up.

Adejobi also lamented the level of social decadence in the country, urging mothers to be vigilant and careful with who they leave their children with.

He said, “Now, you will agree with me, to an extent, that our problems in Nigeria are grossly connected to social decadence. Every problem in Nigeria today is tailored to one societal issue or the other. If we address our societal problems, our general problems in Nigeria are 80 per cent solved.

“Until we arrest them, we won’t know what actually happened. The mother might not be there. I gave an analogy that it might be the mother’s sister who even took the baby to visit her boyfriend.

“He must be caused to face the wrath of the law. This is too bad. But above all, mothers must learn from this. Ire o.”