Let’s call a spade a spade. We have a parenting crisis in our hands right now. Across all demographic groups and social classes, there is a crisis of parenting which is feeding a crisis of youth delinquency.
In recent times, our country is grappling with a distressing upsurge in juvenile delinquency, drug abuse, and related social dysfunction within the ranks of the youth and young adults.
No one in this country today can deny that we are afraid of our own youth. From Lagos to Port Harcourt, from Maiduguri to Benin, youths are simply on a rampage of violence and anti-social behaviour.
Poor parenting is the major factor contributing to this alarming trend. To curb these high rates of youth misbehaviour and delinquency we must first understand the role of parents and other adults in preparing the youth for a life of responsibility and discipline.
First, the parent must himself or herself understand that he/she is a role model to the child. The child first copies its own parents with whom he spends his most impressionable early years.
When the parent is mostly absent, the child is denied the parameter setting duty by its parent’s absence. This is further exacerbated by social pressure and unbridled influence of both peer groups and untrammeled social media access.
Smart Phone As Culprit
The rise of smart phones and video sharing apps has further worsened the impact of absentee parents who by their absence are not in any position to monitor the kind of information and mental diet that their children consume.
In a country where it is now normal for both parents to go off to work or business, the children are basically left to their own devices. It is therefore not surprising that these children left on their own become prey to negative communication through social media and television.
In many countries, there are filters imposed on social apps such as TikTok and Facebook, but not in our country. Even as an adult, some of the videos I come across are so morally repugnant that I cringe at the fact that these same videos are watched by young impressionable children.
Youth Delinquency As A By Product
Simply put, juvenile delinquency is itself largely a fault of parenting and social irresponsibility of adults. In the cities of Nigeria, one can say without doubt that children are no longer brought up or positively influenced by their parents. Take Lagos for instance, due to traffic and tight work schedules, many children do not spend up to 10 minutes per day with their parents, though they live together in the same house.
Some Lagos parents leave home for work before the kids awake in the morning and return after their own kids have gone to bed. The parents simply exert no moral guidance nor provide ethical examples to these kids.
Indeed, modern parents expect schools to do their parenting for them. Some other parents rely on house helps and other domestic staff to play parenting roles in their stead. Clearly that is not possible as parenting is one of the responsibilities that cannot be delegated.
It is important that as a nation we understand that there is today, a parenting crisis. Anyone who cares to know will easily confirm that delinquency is on the rise in cities and very chronic in the upper classes. It is indeed alarming within the political elite. The children of politicians and the economic elite are the most hard hit because their parents are hardly available to guide and monitor them.
Poor Parenting
Poor parenting refers to inadequate or ineffective parenting practices that can have detrimental effects on a child’s physical, emotional, cognitive, and social development. It refers to a lack of essential skills, attention, understanding, and support necessary for nurturing a child in a healthy and positive manner. Poor parenting can manifest in various ways, some of which include neglect of parental responsibility.
Neglectful parenting refers to failure to meet a child’s basic needs, such as adequate nutrition, clothing, shelter, supervision, and medical care. It includes emotional neglect, where a child’s emotional and psychological needs for affection, attention, and validation are consistently disregarded.
As said earlier, due to work and business, Nigerian parents consistently leave their young children unsupervised thus neglecting their safety and well-being.
Another example of poor parenting is permissive parenting. Permissive parents exhibit a lack of boundaries and discipline thus allowing children to make decisions without appropriate guidance. Many parents in the name of love are overly lenient. They avoid setting clear expectations, rules, or consequences. For instance, when you allow a child stay up late, skip school, or have unrestricted access to technology without setting appropriate limits or rules.
Inconsistent parenting occurs when parents are unpredictable in their behaviour, rules, and responses. Children find it difficult to understand what is expected of them, leading to confusion and insecurity. For instance, punishing a child for a behaviour one day but ignoring the same behaviour the next day without providing any explanation.
The consequence of poor parenting is youth delinquency, a trend that has created many problems for families, communities and the nation at large. These delinquent behaviours may vary in severity and can encompass anything from minor offences to serious criminal acts. Delinquency often involves actions or behaviours that are deemed harmful, disruptive, or illegal by society, and it may lead to legal consequences for the individual involved.
Youth Delinquency And Drug Abuse
Fact is that properly guided youth are most unlikely to engage in drug and substance abuse. When parents show good behaviour guidance, their offsprings tend to live within the parameters of behaviour set for them at home.
But when kids are left to their own devices, they may stray into the dangerous zone of illicit substance use.
Drug abuse has become a significant public health concern in Nigeria today with all manner of drugs proliferating. Alcohol is also widely abused by the youths due to its accessibility. Binge drinking and excessive consumption have become socially acceptable common practices.
Marijuana is now so often used recreationally by youths that its smell is almost ubiquitous. Misuse of drugs, such as opioids, stimulants, and sedatives, often obtained without a doctor’s prescription, is a growing concern.
Abuse of these drugs can lead to a range of physical health issues, including cardiovascular problems, liver and kidney damage, respiratory issues, impaired immune function, malnutrition, and increased risk of accidents or injuries.
A drug habit can lead to financial problems, including debt, loss of savings, or a resort to illegal activities to fund the addiction. Substance abuse often lead to risky behaviours such as unsafe sex, dangerous driving, or other criminal activities that put the individual and society at risk.
A Professor of Neuropsychiatry, University of Port-Harcourt, Rivers State, Prof Princewill Chukwuemeka Stanley recently disclosed that the country loses about N10 billion annually due to drugs and substance abuse. This estimate is considered too low when care cost of the mentally ill by their families are computed.
All these challenges can be nipped early if parents simply spend more quality time with their children particularly during their early formation. Parenting is not just giving gifts or money to kids; parenting emphasis is attention to the growing child.
MAY NIGERIA REBOUND
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