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The Silent Drift: Habits That Make Children Lose Respect For Parents

by Christiana Nwaogu
3 weeks ago
in Feature
Habits That Make Children Lose Respect for Parents
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Respect is one of the most valuable gifts a parent can receive from their child , not forced, but freely given through love, trust, and emotional connection. Yet, many parents unknowingly chip away at that respect through everyday habits and parenting styles that may seem harmless on the surface. Over time, these small cracks can cause a silent drift between parent and child, where affection is replaced with obligation and respect fades into resentment.

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  1. Constant Criticism

Children who grow up being told they’re not good enough, not smart enough, not neat enough, and not obedient enough ,  may start to believe it. When all they hear is what they’re doing wrong, they begin to tune out their parents’ voices and turn inward or rebel. Respect can’t thrive in a home where love feels conditional on perfection.

 

  1. Public Embarrassment

Scolding a child in front of others, whether at family gatherings or on social media, may leave a deeper wound than many parents realise. While the intention might be discipline, the result is often humiliation. Children remember how they were made to feel — and embarrassment leaves a lasting impression.

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  1. Never Apologising

Parents make mistakes, too. But when they refuse to acknowledge them or say “sorry,” they teach their children that authority equals immunity. A parent who can apologise models humility, accountability, and maturity , qualities that inspire respect, not demand it.

 

  1. Emotional Neglect

Feeding, clothing, and schooling your child is important, but so is emotional nourishment. When parents are physically present but emotionally unavailable  too busy, distracted, or disinterested  children begin to feel unseen. Over time, that distance breeds detachment.

 

  1. Using Fear To Control

Yelling, threatening, or using harsh punishment might bring short-term obedience, but it weakens long-term respect. Children may fear their parents, but they won’t feel safe with them ,  and there’s a big difference. True respect is built on trust, not terror.

 

  1. Being Hypocritical

“Do as I say, not as I do” rarely works. Children are observant. When they see parents break the very rules they enforce  whether it’s lying, being rude, or acting irresponsibly  they begin to question their authority and lose respect for their words.

 

  1. Disregarding Their Opinions

As children grow, they develop thoughts, perspectives, and boundaries. Ignoring or mocking these not only stifles confidence but sends the message that their voice doesn’t matter. Respect grows in a home where conversation  not control , is encouraged.

 

  1. Overcontrol And Lack Of Trust

Micromanaging your child’s life can lead to either rebellion or emotional withdrawal. When children aren’t trusted to make age-appropriate decisions, they start to resent the lack of freedom. Respect flows more naturally when children feel believed in.

 

  1. Withholding Affection

Some parents think showing too much love spoils a child , but withholding affection rarely breeds discipline. Instead, it leaves children questioning their worth. Hugs, kind words, and encouragement don’t weaken authority; they strengthen connection, which is the root of lasting respect.

When parenting is rooted in empathy, consistency, and humility, it creates a foundation where respect is mutual and permanent. The goal isn’t to be feared or obeyed at all costs, but to build a relationship strong enough to last a lifetime.


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